Where to start.... again...

Well, this is attempt number 3 for me starting a blog... 
Why this time? Because I have a story to tell. A huge, long, twisted, emotional, ongoing story! And it won’t be chronological. I’m just starting from now, with how I’m feeling and what’s happening in my head. I’ll jump back and forth when the feels get me, so try to keep up. Or don’t... read what you will, think what you think. This is more of a therapy for me. But if what I’m going through is relatable to your life, take it. If I can help you feel less “alone”, more “normal” or even amuse you in some way, embrace it. I don’t have all the answers, heck I don’t even know what the questions are! I’m just making my own path through this crazy life I’ve been given. 

I like to use quotes and analogies a lot. And song lyrics! I feel like everything in my life can be found in a song somewhere. So be prepared to learn some new tunes as you read along, you might even like them ;) Take the title of this new blog for example “learning to live again” is not only what I’ve had to do and continue doing every day, it’s also a song by my all time favourite artist Mr Garth Brooks. Given my love for quoting lyrics, it will come as no great surprise that I also love to sing said lyrics. Quite often. And loud! Much to the disapproval of my children.... 

Oh yes, my children. I’m a single mumma of 2 human children (miss 7 and mr 5) and also a  pirate dog. He’s not actually a pirate (duh) but he does only have one eye. He thinks he’s a big tough guy, but all he’s likely to do is lick you to death. And maybe gas you with his doggy breath.... We live in “tropical paradise” North Queensland, we don’t go to the beach often enough and we spend way too much time indoors! I’m really hoping to start taking us on some adventures as the weather “cools down”....

I have struggled with anxiety and depression since high school. Always worried what people think of me, always overthinking things and analysing to the extreme. But I’ve also learnt how to combat that (sometimes). A huge development in my mental strength came through joining a gym! Yup, exercise is good for your mind! I do personal training 3 times a week and I can deadlift 100kg.... so if I can do that, I can handle any other shit that comes my way right!? 

So for the last 3 years since shit went down, I’ve been getting up, putting my big girl pants on, and handling it! It’s been far from easy.... I wouldn’t recommend taking the trip I have to reach the point I’m at... but somehow, I’ve done it.